I’m Officially a Published Author.

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When I was young, I remember watching OJ Simpson blaze down the highway in a white Bronco and thinking to myself that I really wanted to be those cool news people that were informing me of what was going on.

So, I spent most of my life dedicated to making that dream happen and eventually got into the super prestigious broadcast journalism program at the University of Texas at Austin where I promptly decided that this career was not meant for me after all. I mean, who wants to earn $20K a year and have to work nights and weekends hoping to make it to a large media market?

Not I. Plus there is simply no way I’d be willing to straighten my hair that often.

I’ve been out of UT for over 8 years now, and I am happy I never explored the TV reporter career. No regrets at all. I do regret not following my passion for writing. Sure, at work I have more writing to do than I care to think about right now to avoid hyperventilating, but I am talking about the free flowing words that are all mine and mine alone. Hence, the blog.

Occasionally though, I have these moments of sheer genius and I write something that kind of goes viral. Or as viral as it can go on Amazon.com. In 2010, in yet another New Year’s Resolution attempt, I bought a Pussycat Dolls workout DVD. That whole phrase is one HUGE oxymoron or a superb example in irony. Workout it is most definitely not, I assure you.

So I wrote about it here, and then I published a more PG-13 version over on the product page on Amazon.com. A year ago Amazon contacted me saying it was being considered for a book of the funniest reviews on Amazon’s website. I was like, “Awesome!” and I signed away my rights to the devil and forgot about it until last week.

Last Wednesday I got a delivery from Amazon, but I hadn’t ordered anything. I opened it up to find the book, and then I promptly found my review, burst into hysterical laughter, screamed, and hugged my husband. Then I called my mom and drank a lot to celebrate.

My words. My writing. My thoughts are published in a book where someone, or lots of someones, deemed that my writing was funny and good enough to be included in nearly 3 pages of a 296 page book. I’m the 1% in this case, y’all!

Ecstatic doesn’t even begin to cover the feeling. I thought about it the next day at work when I was feeling particularly crappy, and I started to cry. I cried because life can be so up and down. One minute you get validation from a HUGE corporation, that like everyone knows about, that they think your work is awesome and deserves to be in a book, and then the next day some cranky co-worker puts you down and makes you feel the size of an ant.

Life, you’re a tad interesting.

I’m taking this as a sign to persevere and write the 2 books I’ve been secretly writing in my head for a few years. One is a DIY/craft book, and the other is a memoir of my adventures the past 6 years.
If you’d like to read the book, aptly titled “Did You Read That Review?: A Compilation of Amazon’s Funniest Reviews”, it’ll be available November 18 on Amazon and will be available for $1.49 for Kindle readers or free for Kindle Unlimited peeps.

And now I will answer the question that I know is BURNING in your mind right now: Sadly, I have no plans for a book tour as of yet, but that may change.